Birds and the Bees (round two)

Oh help, the birds and the bees question has come up again!

And this time Master Six wouldn't settle for "A seed just grew into a baby in the mummy's tummy".

"Well the father sheep put it in the mother sheep," I expanded.

"No, ‘cos sheep aren't alive!"

"What?"

"I mean, they don't have hands like people so how did the sheep put the seed in there?"

Is it too soon to tell a six-year-old that his willy did it?

Anyway I did tell him about the willy and they all cracked up (the twins were listening in the back seat so there was no escaping).

But then of course he wanted to know how the baby sheep came out of the mummy’s tummy and was rather disgusted to learn of their mode of exit.

“Does that mean that real babies come out their mum’s bums?” he asked, eyes wide with incredulation.

“Mmmhmm,” I nodded looking straight ahead wondering how on earth the conversation had got this far.

With a look of disgust, he turned toward the window for most of the journey.

Then: “So did all my friends come out of their mum’s bottoms?”

“Well I don’t know,” As we were nearing the school gates, I was keen to shut the conversation down.

“Did Samuel? (Name changed to save face.)

“I don’t know.”

He then proceeded to reel off a list of all his friends’ names in a bid to learn if they suffered the same entry into the world.

Okay, time to kick in with the privacy talk. A hasty lesson on what is okay to talk about in public ensued.

But that had opened the floodgates. I copped a volley of questions all the way home from the twins. I knew I had probably dealt with it all wrong and made a mental note to look up how to field birds and the bees questions when I got home.

For information on how to deal with these questions read "Birds and the Bees - Part One"