Terrible Twos

Last week I had two revelations in quick succession. The first was that I am experiencing the “Terrible Twos” times two. 

Look what I caught them doing to
their photo album!

 Had I cottoned onto this fact earlier I would have used it as my excuse for the last year.

My excuse for my mess of a house, even though I seem to be constantly tidying. My excuse when someone overhears me yelling my head off in an unattractive manner or, when I just plain can’t be bothered, out of sheer exhaustion, reprimanding my lot when we have guests and I catch their shocked expression.

Sprung!

I could use it for my excuse for anything really. Like when I was breastfeeding the twins and ate like a horse. I’ve actually always been a pig but for 14 months (not to mention the nine months prior) I had a good excuse. Then when I stopped I realised, not only could I no longer get away with that justification, I also couldn’t get away with eating what I liked so I pulled my head in quick-smart.

The demands of a two-year-old are relentless. They want it all and they want it now and

if I can’t cater to their needs asap they will throw themselves on the floor and kick and scream.

Little Missy, once my placid one, has become a real madam and throws the most unreasonable strops. I was told this morning in a fit of rage that I’m going to jail. Who taught her about jail? Does she even know what it is? And Master Two no longer loves me whenever I reprimand him. However, he is quick to reinstate his affections when it’s morning tea time.

Walking up to school is rather tedious. While Jai is happy to walk ahead keeping up with his brother, Missy will suddenly decide she’s homeward bound and about turn and head back down the hill. I’m left standing in the middle as the distance between us all gets larger, wondering who to go after. I see where a double leash would come in handy.

Yes, the naughty corner has definitely had significant foot traffic over the last year which brings me to my second revelation: in only a matter of weeks the twins will be turning three and surely this means the end of the “terrible twos”.

But no sooner had I felt that ripple of excitement when I had a flash of déjà vu and my spirits lowered themselves back to base: I was aged 19, just days away from my 20^th, signaling the end to “teenage pimples”.

The chances are slim to none.

# Author of bestselling Of course I love you… NOW GO TO YOUR ROOM! Diane Levy prefers to describe the “terrible twos” as the “terrific twos”.

She believes it disempowers parents and ignores the fact that the behaviour is a normal and necessary stage on the path from child to adulthood.

“Children are beginning to realise that they are independent beings with an identity separate from their parents and they are exercising this newfound independence.”

However, Diane is quick to point out that this doesn’t mean parents should ignore “bad behaviour”. 

She says many parents believe they have to put up with tantrums, screaming fits and – in some cases – bad language simply because their children are going through “a stage” which they’ll “grow out off”.

Diane advises parents that there are three actions fundamental for supporting their child’s development and passage into adulthood:  respect their integrity, support their feelings and set boundaries.