Vomiting Bug

It’s hard work looking after sick people when you’re not feeling too flash yourself and you’re not a good nurse at the best of times.

It’s been a week of: “Mum, I need a drink of water.”, “Mum, can I have some medicine?”, “Can you put a dvd on?” “I need a sick bowl.”

This all being yelled at me from various rooms of the house. And then the latest: “Mum, I have the hiccups.”

I know how to get rid of the hiccups: “Ragghh!” There – fixed.

In case you hadn’t guessed, the tummy bug hit our household this week. It has been doing the rounds and, if it hasn’t hit you yet, don’t be too smug.

You can pretty much guarantee that if one family member comes down with it, it will wipe out the entire junior associates at least.

So after the twins had vomited throughout their dad’s car and all through their beds and then had the subsequent days off school from lethargy, I was pretty amazed when a day or two went by without their older brother getting it.

Master Eight has had a change in attitude of late, earning him stickers for his sticker chart left, right and centre. But one night early this week there was a slip-up. I reminded him what it felt like to be unwell and how he would like it if this was antagonized by someone saying something unkind.

And then I followed with the usual: “Remember, bad things happen when you’re naughty.”

I was actually a little nervous of this happening – I guess it’s one of the many downsides to being a working mother – but it was just a matter of waiting for the inevitable really.

Sure enough, that night, just after I’d drifted off, I was awoken to a slight choking sound, followed by “Pitter-patter, pitter-patter.”

I turned on the light, just in time to witness a large volume of vomit fly across my ensuite.

He almost made it on time and I had to give him ten points for trying.

My poor little man was sent back off to bed with a sick bowl and I cleaned up the mess and went back to bed.

However, it just wasn’t my night. I’d no sooner switched off the light when I heard the unmistakable sound of a cat coughing up what I thought was a fur ball.

On went the light again and I leaned over the bed to witness something resembling a string of sausages erupting from my cat’s mouth.

I’m sorry, I should have warned you not to be eating your breakfast before reading this.

It seemed I was up to my eye balls in barf and I resigned to the fact that sleep would be eluding me that night. It was going to be one of those nights.

It seemed to be just a 12-hour thing but when you times that by three and take into account the subsequent days of lethargic kids listlessly rolling round on the couch with empty stomachs, it all adds up. Because, instead of coming down with bugs in unison, it’s one after the other like a domino-effect.

However, Master Eight’s tummy bug lingered. When I was sure it was over, I arose that morning with a positive attitude, certain everyone would be back at school and I could return to work.

But, minutes later my plans for the day went down the toilet literally as I helplessly watched an entire stomach’s contents land in it.

So, if all this fun and games hasn’t hit your household this week, here’s a head’s up: if your children uncharacteristically go off their food, line their beds with towels and have spew bowls at the ready.

Maybe steer clear of feeding them meatballs and noodles too …